i just passed a couple of young ladies on the street where i live. seen them before. teenagers, probably over 15, under 20. legal adults? it's very hard to tell the difference between a 15 and a 19 year old. the big change occurs at puberty. it's easy to differentiate between a pre-pubescent 11 year old and a post pubescent 13 year old. growth spurt and breast development. but past puberty, a few years of age difference is hard to tell.
i've seen these 'girls' before but never spoke to them, passing by on foot or bicycle. today as i was passing by on my bike, one of them called out to me in a suggestive way, an invitation to stop and talk.
something like this has happened to me countless times in my adult years, and especially as i've gotten older and more aware of 'age of consent' laws and how viciously reviled and persecuted are 'adults' who show an interest in legal 'children' (accused and convicted 'sex offenders' are always in the news, often for having forbidden relations with 'minors'), i've assiduously avoided responding. taking into account that some women in their 20s can pass for being considerably younger, what these 'age of consent' laws effectively do is put a stark chill on responding to all young sheeple who are attractive and interested in attracting a mate.
as i think i've discussed previously in this blog, i've always been attracted to 'jail bait' teenagers as well as slightly older women who are pretty and petite enough to pass for them. ever since i was a teenager myself, i've been aware that such attraction was verboten and liable to get me in deep trouble. when i was young i didn't think that much of it, since i hadn't learned to properly question 'authority'. since i have, i've always felt very disturbed and depressed about it. heart sick, actually. it eats away at me, building more and more resentment and a sense of extreme alienation and isolation from my own species, especially those who avidly embrace dogmatic and puritanical 'morality' and artificial laws. for a long time it's been perfectly obvious to me that these only serve to oppress and increase the suffering, frustration, and difficulty of human life.
june is gay pride month. i get some sense of solace and brotherhood from the stories of LGBQT sheeple who have had to fight against their own oppression, but i also know from experience that just because one experiences a certain type of oppression doesn't necessarily mean that one will feel empathy or solidarity with those who experience a different (but related) type of oppression. the villain as i see it is dogmatic puritanism which can take many shapes and fuel many different oppressions, but unfortunately for me (and i think for my whole world), far too many sheeple fail to make such a connection. they see no reason to universally condemn dogmatic puritanism.
i'm thinking as i have occasionally in the relatively recent past about coming out of the closet as a 'pedophile' (by writing about it and publishing this blog, i am somewhat). i'm quite certain that i am not alone as such. it's perfectly normal and natural to be aroused by pubescent females, considering that they have only begun the aging process and are at or near the peak of their fertility and of course have their whole fertile lives ahead of them. i suspect this is so for all species, yet it's only us humans, with our seemingly infinite capacity for false rationalizion, deceit, and susceptibility to indoctrination (the basis for all dogmatic 'faith' or religion), who have insanely concocted the idea, buttressed by pseudo science, that post pubescent teenagers ought to still be regarded as children (actual children are also erotic beings whose eroticism ought not be repressed) who lack sufficient wisdom to make 'adult' choices such as whether to engage in erotic relations with a partner. notice i specify 'erotic relations' as opposed to actual intercourse, for the way laws and common attitudes are, just about any sort of erotic activity for youth is taboo. again, it seems obvious to me this is repression, making everyone neurotically fearful and ashamed of human nature, but anyone else so aware and bold enough to come out of the closet about it is extremely rare indeed. were i to come prominently out of said closet i suspect i would have to face the subsequent onslought of vicious hate and persecution all alone.
erotic demonization and suppression are a large and essential aspect to the dystopia we're born into and must live with, but it's not all of it. i've tried to shed light on other aspects of it on this blog (and elsewhere) to no avail. i don't understand why it's so damned difficult to make others see what i so plainly see, but it is, even among my fellow 'radicals'.
